One of my first memories of childhood is sitting at the edge of a cornfield wathcing the sun sweep a rolling shadow across the landscape. I was mesmerized, all of four years old, the thought drifted through my mind that God must be doing that, then the thought that he was up there looking down on me, finally the thought that if he was looking down on me then that meant that he could see me, the thought frightened me a little (a lot at the time) and I took to my heels to seek refuge in the company of my mother.
Mum at the time, unbeknown to me, was cleaning the budgie cage out, the bird was out and the dog and I were on the other side of the door, of course her cry not to open the door and let the dog in came a little too late.. We didnt get off to a good start this God and I.
Later I remember watching gliders sail in rich blue skies, again I was captivated, how on earth did they stay up there? I imagined this God just the other side of the clouds and had thought these little planes and their inhabitants were just a whisker away from seeing him, long white beard and all. I wondered what it would be like to go up there and get that close, but told myself that this was only for the rich,something out of my reach.I had absolutely no religious input in my childhood, yet always had the sense that there was something bigger up there, out there, I loved the mystery I think.
Its another memory that stayed and hung around for a long long time and many years later I saw advertised in a local newspaper trial flights at a local airfield nearby. I booked,spur of the moment decision whilst out shopping one day, I only had to make the decision when by giving the airfield a phone and organise a good day weatherwise.
The day came and I decided I would just have to do it, no ifs, no buts. I was told to come along whenever I wanted. I left the house with seven little faces cheering me on, but thinking ‘ this is madness, what if something happens, all the what if’s I could muster, what would people say if something did happen…..Stupid woman.dah dah dah..
When I got to the airfield another group of gliders had arrived from Carlise and I was told I would have to wait until they had taken their flights, to come back in a couple of hours..WHAT!!! I had doubts, if I went back home my courage would melt into thin air and I may well not make it back to the airfield. But home I went and found it hard to focus on anything other than not talking myself out of this experience, I had some wonderful arguements with myself that morning.
When I finally made my way back I still had to wait another half hour so I went for a drive around the field, my heart was pounding, the very idea of actually going up was causing Adrenalin to pump through my body like a rampant fire, I was stressed to the point of paralysis at times, not speaking, not daring to think too much. It was when I parked up on this drive that I noticed a young child with her father, she was endevouring to ride her bike, without stabilizers. As I watched her shriek with fear and delight, wobble, fall and get up and try again, I remembered the fear and excitement of learning to ride a two wheeler myself, did I or she give up? Did we heck, we carried on despite the fear and learned what we wanted so much to learn.. That young girl restored my courage, my purpose and off I went, renewed.
I off course had expected some Tom Cruise look alike, this was not to be, my pilot was a retired gentleman, with many deep lines on his face, I was later to find out he was nearing 70. I dismissed my fears that he could well be a canditate for a coronary and replaced these with the comfort of telling myself, those lines speak of a deep experience of life and gliding especially. I had to trust just as the little girl had trusted her father.
I was shaking like a leaf,when this flimsy little thing took to the air, and with bated breathe waited for the big drop when the winch that was pulling us upwards was released, but this was not how it was. I was taken completely by surprise when the plane just sat there, suspended in what seemed like nothingness, and only this beautiful stillness, sunshine and peace.
I remembered a prayer that I had heard. Christ on my left side, Christ on my right side, Christ above me, Christ below me….or words to that effect, and thats exactly how it felt at that moment as if cradled in the hands of God himself. The sun streaming into the tiny cockpit and looking down to the land below and all around me felt like I was in the womb of the world, one of the most beautiful days I have ever experienced.
The pilot was excellent, showing me thermals of warm air and shelves that held the plane up allowing it to glide, though they were invisible to my eye I was happy to believe him, also showing me how the controls work by shifting weights etc, he even allowed me to have a go, and I did for a minute, just a minute however, just in case!!
All in all I was up in the air for around 25minutes and loved every moment. My legs were like jelly when I was back on terra firma, and stopping at some traffic lights on the way home I had an overwhelming urge to jump out and grab the man sat opposite me and do the happy dance of ‘Guess what Ive just done’, however I saved that for the children who I was only too delighted to see again.
No air conditioning, no sickbags or safety jackets, just wings and mother nature….Unforgettable
UPDATE:- Today I started by counting my blessings, Life has held many challenging experiences , Im stronger for them in lots of ways. Not hearing from Pat since easter has been hard despite my texting, he is obviously not in a position to answer at the moment, so instead of dwelling on it I got upstairs and cleaned and prepared his room, ready for his homecoming, fingers crossed mid May.
Then I rang i to i the company I want to travel with and asked if the could find me a suitable placement working with children, the lady I spoke to suggested I could help out in a hospital given my nursing background and have promised to e.mail possibilities on to me. I made my son Joseph a lovely meal and cleaned my kitchen from top to bottom, not startling stuff, looking in the right direction at least.
After a long hard day it was so nice to go to the easter egg hunt and see that its raised so much money, Well done all the team, and that I got given these lovely badges to put on my blog, I shall wear them with pride and they really put a smile on my face……..they are SO CUTE, THANKYOU
Natasha and Alex looking for fairies in the magic wood and fountain, Grandad said they might see them if they were really quiet and patient. Whilst Natashas eyes were all agog and she was absorbed in the story, Alex raised his eyebrows upwards and gave a knowing smile and sigh, Silly girls I heard him say..lol
Honey came too of course and this is her enjoying a bask in the sunshine, that is until her highly honed dog sniffing skills came upon this fairy wandering around, well thats what he answered too… 
JONATHON LIVINGSTONE SEAGULL?
STONEHAVEN BAY
FLOWERS FOR EASTER